Sunday, January 13, 2008

Thats the best that I can do... today

As you all know, I've been diagnosed with diabetes. I found out when I went to the doctor because of excess tiredness and chest pains and that is what he found out. When I found out, my sugar was over 400. It now runs between 210 and 250, which is some improvement, but still not good. As a consequence of the tiredness and pain in my legs I haven't been walking like I was doing before. (if you've read any of my earlier posts, you will know that before the problems started I had worked myself up to walking between 3 and 3.5 miles a day) In fact, I haven't walked any in a month or more. So today, while I was waiting for my first load of laundry to wash, I thought, what the heck? Let me do a little walking on the treadmill. My goal was to do at least 15 minutes or half a mile, whichever came first. By the time I had walked for 5 minutes my legs felt like they wanted to fall off. By 10 minutes they were screaming at me to stop. So, the best I could do was 13 minutes and .4 miles. Today.

Tomorrow I will go farther, if it's only 13 minutes and 30 seconds or .41 miles. I will go farther. I refuse to be this fat, ugly, lazy, lump for the rest of my life. I was doing so good, too. I was getting fit, I was loosing weight, I was feeling better about my life and my self, I was gaining confidence. And now I have start all over. But I can do it. I know I can. I have to. I want to feel good again and have energy and be able to do the things I want to do.

At first I was sort of depressed at how bad I did today. But I'm not going to fall into that trap. I should be impressed that I was able to do as good as I did considering how I feel. I should be proud of myself. And I am, now, after I've had a little while to think about it. And I am baking bread today, so I got a good workout for my arms, too. Sourdough bread takes some kneading. I haven't done it in a while and I can already feel it in my forearms. They will be sore tomorrow, I'm sure. But the bread is always worth it.

Anyway, just needed to reaffirm that I am a worthwhile person and that I did good today. Everyone should feel free to encourage and/or congratulate me. A little soul butter would feel so good right about now.


tricia said...

I too have been diagnosed with Type II diabetes. It's a daily struggle but one that must be dealt with. One of my biggest obstacles is that good friends who know still haven't learned anything about diabetes and still prepare really starchy meals when I'm visiting. Even when I explain that carbohydrates turn into sugar and "white" isn't really good in foods, I get blank stares and "I didn't know". They still make sweets and expect me to eat the desserts they prepare. I'll make desserts for them, but don't eat them.

Just had my medicine changed this month! Praise God and pass the mustard! Although it worked, one of the bad side effects was weight gain. I can tell a difference already. Eating some ethnic foods seems to be a healthier way to go - just found an Oriental shop in Little Rock that I will be visiting this week. Just have to keep telling myself that the weight didn't come on overnight and won't come off overnight. Patience grasshopper......

I'm looking for new recipes to start the year off right. Do you have any special ones?

Keep up the good work with your walking. I can do some but after 3 knee surgeries (2 on one, 1 on the other), it really slows me down. Once the really bad one is replaced in the next few years, I can get back to normal (whatever that is).

Jeannie said...

There are going to be times when you feel the diabetes is in your way. That is understandable. I think it is great that you walked, even though it really starting to bother you. Whether it be for 13 minutes or for 130 minutes, be proud of your accomplishment. I am.

Can you break up the walking into two parts of the day- walk for five minutes in the morning and for five minutes in the evening? There's nothing wrong with doing it like that.

On Friday, I only did 20 minutes of aerobic activity- 15 minutes on the stair climber and about 5 minutes on the treadmill. I just didn't want to move. It happens to everyone, but I do understand how you feel.

Hang in there. We're all behind you.

pamwax said...

As I used to tell my mother-in-law, it doesn't matter how far or how fast. Just keep moving. Doing a little today and a little more tomorrow is fantastic. Build up a little at a time. As your sugar level improves so will your workouts.

I have been disappointed in myself that I let my back side grow to such proportions. Then one day I said stop hitting yourself over the head and do something about it. Thanks Nagano and our Bunny. We will just have to be each other's support system. I am proud of beautiful little ole you.

I try to keep Neil under control. Type II runs in his family and he is on his way. He just won't listen. Tricia is right about white and it drives him crazy because that is what he likes and his wife won't buy.

Sour dough yum yum. I used to have starter and made my own. It is alot of work but so good.

Some Kinda Wonderful said...

Thanks, you guys. Your support means so much to me. Its so much easier to carry on when you have friends who care for you, isn't it?
I have some good news. I guess that walk really did help. I checked my sugar a bit ago and it was 169. That's the lowest it's been since I first was diagnosed. I feel pretty good about that. It will be extra incentive for me to get my butt up and walk every day.

Jeannie said...

Oh, that's fantastic!!! What a big drop too!

Some Kinda Wonderful said...

Thanks Jeannie, I thought so too.

tricia, the biggest thing I have been doing since I found out is trying to cut out what you called the "white" foods. I've been using more whole grains and different kinds of grains in my breads, pancakes, biscuits and yeast breads. We do a lot of pasta and rice in my house, too, so I've gone to whole wheat pasta, which isn't bad, and I'm trying to learn to like brown rice.
I have also found a wonderful website for diabetic recipes:

My favorite thing so far that I've tried from there is the Baked Ziti with Meatballs, really yummy. If you haven't found it for yourself, yet, you should take a look.

nutz4nagsno said...

Hey Holly, I just caught up with the comments here, and I just wanted to give you a special pat on the back, and a hug too. You sound like you have taken that bull by the horns. Just reading your words, I can hear your determination and drive. Makoto would be as proud of you as we are! Keep up the good work. We know you can do it.

tricia said...

I'll check out the website. Bought an attachment for my blender that will make only 2 cups of something at a time - going to try making smoothies for breakfast. Hope that removes some of the temptation to get fast food breakfast in the mornings.

Glad the walking is lowering your sugar. I have a mini trampoline that I use sometimes when my knee is bothering me. Seems to not be as rough. Every little bit helps.

Keep up the good work.

tricia said...

How is your sugar level now? Is the walking helping it go down? The new medicine I'm on seems to work but the levels are higher than the old meds. I haven't been on it for quite a month so maybe it takes a while to get the old stuff out of your system and the new stuff in.

Never thought I could give up sweet tea but finally hit on a formula using Equal, Splenda and Sweet n Low. The Wal Mart brand of Equal isn't too bad.

Hope you're getting control of your diabetes - it's a challenge but you can do it.

Take care.

Some Kinda Wonderful said...

My sugar is still going up and down. The lowest it's been is that 169 it was the day I posted this blog. It's been in the low 200's but today it was 365 when I woke up and it was 330 after I ate breakfast and took my first walk. I have another doctor appointment on the 29th, so we'll see... He said if it wasn't better by then he would probably change my medicine. I'm certain he is going to.

tricia said...

I'm hoping to stay on my new meds. I was on Actos but a bad side effect is weight gain. I've already started losing since being off of it. Keep fighting and doing the best you can.

tricia said...

Read where you learned things in your class. Anything helpful? I have a book on diabetes that I started reading again. One of the big things for me is stress and lack of sleep. If I don't get enough sleep, my glucose level is too high in the a.m.

Keep up the good work.